Wow, just wow.

I am angry.  More angry than I think I have ever been.  I try to be understanding.  I try to make excuses.  Then I get lied to, or attitude like I have done something wrong.  This last week was a clusterfudge. The other grandmother decided to make plans for coming to my house Sunday to have cake and presents for Ayla, when the mother had already made plans for a family party. She also threw in a snide comment about not being allowed to take the girls off my property.  (Like that was my fault.)  I told the woman one party was enough.  So she decided to vent on the girls mother, who in turn whined to me.  So I told them Brandy could not change my decision no matter how much they badgered her.  That the judge gave my husband and I sole discretion.  Well that set them off on how the Indian courts will change that.  They didn’t like hearing that there was an Indian representative at the hearing……. Later in the day, Ayla asked could she call Gran and invite her to the party special.  I dialed the number and put it on speaker phone,  Gran answered.  Ayla called her name twice.  I heard Gran’s boyfriend in the backround and the woman hung up on her!!!   At that point, I informed both parents that that woman and her boyfriend where to have no contact with the girls at all.  They were no longer allowed to come with dad for his scheduled visitation, and if they showed up here, I would have them arrested for trespass.  Ayla cried for almost an hour.  She is 4.  The dad called, and agreed.  What kind of person does that to a child?  I am having such a hard time letting go of my anger.  My neck and back is so tight, I feel bruised from it.

I am still angry at the parents as well.  Every day I learn something I didn’t want to know.  The kids are confused as well.  They love their parents and want to be with them, but they want to be with them here, in my house.  I know they say that they want to stay here forever because they think I want to hear that.  But what if they mean it?  I love my daughter but her drug and alcohol abuse is hurting her kids.  She says she wants her kids back, but I don’t see her doing anything to make that happen.  No job, still drinking, still getting high.  No classes, no anger management nothing……. And no clue what Travis has done.  Except make a child support payment…. one.   Ok, someone needs me.  Another time